


The Closest Thing to Love is Hate

by me_and_phil



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-14
Updated: 2018-03-14
Packaged: 2019-03-31 08:59:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13971696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/me_and_phil/pseuds/me_and_phil
Summary: Phil is the author of bestselling Sci-fi novel "Federico Striker: Astronaut and Ruler of the Galaxy". Dan is the screenwriter adapting Phil's book into movie. They don't get along. At least that's what Phil lets Dan believe. Another really short fic for the 2018 Winter Phandom Games.





	The Closest Thing to Love is Hate

**Author's Note:**

> The requirements for this fic was "1000 word story placing Dan and Phil in your dream jobs." I couldn't decide between screenwriter or author, so I picked both lol. This story was alternatively titled "He Likes This Better Than Fighting" and all my love to anyone who gets that reference :)

It was a surprise to no one that Dan and Phil were arguing in the conference room. They were two months into the movie production for Striker Returns: The Revenge of Daniel Dream X, a sequel to Phil Lester’s sci-fi novel-turned- blockbuster Federico Striker: Astronaut and Ruler of the Galaxy. When Phil sold the rights for his book to be turned into a movie trilogy, he insisted that he stayed on set and would have a large part in its production. Since day one, him and Dan Howell, the one in charge of adapting the book for screen, didn’t get along. They both had different visions for how lines should be delivered, what Striker’s true motives were, and most importantly, who the love interest was. For the sequel film, Phil had created Daniel Dream X: a cyborg with an obsession of finding Federico Striker and harvesting his brains to gain knowledge of the galaxy’s top secrets. When Phil had thought up the cyborg, he had intended to create a fictional version of Dan to be crushed and defeated in theaters across the world.

Unfortunately, when the fans got ahold of leaked concept art and background information on Daniel, they immediately started shipping the two together. Phil was trying to regain control, but the higher powers behind the film wanted to give the fans what they wanted. And what they wanted was steamy galactic emperor on tortured cyborg action.

“I just don’t see how Federico and Susan could possibly have a true connection if she can’t ever leave her home country! He has to watch over the twelve systems! Not babysit a mermaid on an ocean planet!” Dan yelled and threw his hands in the air.

Phil pushed up his glasses and re-crossed his arms. “I’m the creator! Daniel Dream X is a psychotic robot bent on destroying the universe. He harbors no good feelings for Striker! And Susan is not a mermaid!!”

Dan waved his hand and rolled his eyes. “Oh whatever! She’s like 75% fish, and 25%...something else. Also, I know the cyborg was a plot to metaphorically beat me up, but just get over it! The fans want it to go in another direction, and the bosses want this to make an ungodly amount of money since your completely “necessary” special effects cost the editing team a fortune. So just let the two have a little on-screen chemistry. They don’t have to have sex half-way through the film or anything.”

“D-Dan! That’s inappropriate to even insinuate!” Phil stuttered and turned beet red. 

Did Dan know what he was insinuating? Phil had created Federico to be a macho, courageous version of himself. That’s why having him beat up Daniel Dream X was going to be so satisfying on screen. To let them have a romance instead, it would basically be watching him and Dan fall in love for the next three months. Phil could hardly contain himself as it was. He and Dan basically played the same role on set so anywhere one went, the other came too. They were inseparable, though not by choice. Well…at least not at first. Spending so much time with Dan for months had made Phil realize that he was falling in love with him. This was a huge issue because Dan was obviously not gay. On set, he only ever flirted with their female co-workers, and he had brought his girlfriend to the first film’s premier. They had since broken up, but that wasn’t the point. Phil had to make himself hate Dan, because being in love with him wasn’t an option.

Dan narrowed his eyes and put his hands on his hips. “What? Why is that inappropriate? Because they’re both male? Are you homophobic Phil?”

Phil wanted to laugh at that, but he just said “No, actually. Seeing as I’m gay.”

Dan arms fell against his sides. “You are?” He asked, shocked.

Phil’s throat bobbed. “Yeah.” He said quietly. Everyone on set already knew it, he didn’t know how that had come as such a surprise to Dan.

“I still don’t get how that’d be inappropriate.” Dan said.

Phil leaned against the conference table next to them and put his hands in his pockets.“Because that would basically be me and you having sex on screen. Daniel is based on you, but obviously, you must realize that Federico is based on who I wish I was.”

Now it was Dan’s turn to flush deep red. “Y-yeah, you know I guess I never thought of it that way. What do you mean Federico is based on who you wish you were?”

“I don’t know.” Phil shrugged. “I mean look at him. He’s strong, accomplished, and has the coolest job in the world: astronaut turned ruler of the galaxy.”

Dan laughed and Phil stared at him, wide-eyed. He never made Dan laugh. Only scream “Phil!!” or “You absolute wreck of a human being!” out of frustration.

Dan realized how out of character it was and coughed into his hand. “Well, Phil, I know we don’t exactly get along, but you know you have those things now don’t you?”

“What?” Phil looked at him confused.

“You have this confidence, this strength about you. You wrote a bestselling book for God’s sake. And…you…you aren’t bad looking Phil.” Dan looked at him earnestly and Phil allowed himself to get sucked into his gorgeous dark brown eyes.

“Why are you complimenting me?” Phil murmured. When did they stop yelling?

“I wanted to try it out.” Dan whispered.

“And?” Phil noticed that Dan was inching closer to him. He was thankful for the presence of the table behind him.

“I like this better than fighting.” Dan said. And then he was kissing him. Winding his hands around his back and into his hair.

Phil felt his stomach drop and his heart soar. He kissed Dan back, and once they broke apart, he had decided that maybe a romance between Federico Striker and Daniel Dream X wasn’t an impossible thing.


End file.
